released October 1, 2015
See individual songs.
- Track Name: 96
Just fucking listen.
- Track Name: unloveable
kill me from your mind because i'll never kill myself. count my blessings subtract my sins. add my losses deduct my wins. it's all the same in someone else's skin.Oh this bleeding tradition on bleeding knees that i pray to. I'm the furthest from a dream. sturdy, thoughtless. ugly, sinful. (backsliding down concrete canyons were my soul drags along dying tones i can't sing along to anymore. left out behind graves shallower than my own.) MY BIGGEST ACHIEVEMENT IS THAT I'M NO LONGER A PART OF YOUR WORLD. (I'm not deeper than the hole i dug for myself.) kill me from your mind.
- Track Name: pink blues
blue for the feelings i was too quick to accept.
the yellow is foreign to me.
red in the face and green with envy.
your pink hue is all i could use. but i don't even know who you are.
excuse me feelings of blue. i don't need you.
blue for the feelings i never failed to accept
the yellow is wrong to me
red in the eyes and green with hatred.
your pink blues are all i could use. but i don't even recognize them now
but for you feelings of blue stay away this day because i don't need you
- Track Name: young
they say the good die young. i say i'm only getting older. but i'm the youngest that I've ever been in my life of sin, let's begin. channeling in to unchannneled affection. locking myself in my cage. I just want to live when i'm dead. I will swallow your frame w every false compliment. born sinner in the worlds embrace I'm praying to the gods i deface. (In other words growing up has gotten the best of me. you caught me in young embrace. I didn't want to carry on. I wanted to be pure and demonless. Leave me be for perfections embrace.) Leave me be for perfections embrace. Though He may never show. i lost my mind in the sane skin white as snow. Oh god I FEEL IT NOW. Transparent. It's apparent. my gods all laugh at me, what do I do when I don't get the joke?bad habits live on i'll never grow up. I'm stuck in this rut i'll never grow up. I don't love myself i'll never grow up. I'm afraid of getting old i'll never grow up. i'll be young forever i'll never grow up. I'll never grow up i'll never grow up i'll never grow up. violence and conversation. i never got them both down. smiled upside down chasing waterfalls i know i'll never drown. 6 feet underground, pound after pound, you showed me words i only doubt. young enough to tell you that i'm old enough to die, old enough to lie and say i'm doing just fine. Please tell me there's an easy way out. please god lie tell me theres an easy way out . I'll never grow up. I'll never grow up.
- Track Name: ugly
Ugly. Contradicting your diction while swallowing permission. Collegiate level of remorse. Synonymous with the sweat of the times. Library is now open, but i still can't be an open book. Sentients. Building houses, building hate. Falling down, falling in love. Regret is a synonym. Fear of losing acquaintances. Resentment toward our offspring, the risk of raising them. The obligation. Anxiety in the name of God. Toward bodies. Warm. Maiming them for an expectant mother. I think I might be sorry.. An animal that can lock itself in a cage after unlocking itself in the first couple places. Imperfect. I'm perfect. Fuck getting by. We're humans and we care enough to say we don't care. We are blessed with sin. We have no wrong, no right. No more prayers. Ugly.
- Track Name: neurotica
SPENT ALL DAY IN THE ABYSS. THIS IS THE SAME BOY that YOUVE MISSED. bathed in the embrace of a demons kiss, and this neurotica still persists
YOU'LL BREAK ME LIKE THE MIRRORS that I USE TO OBSESS. I want to be lost. lost in days. dazed. this is a neurotic haze, i hope this is a passing phase. am i breathing am i wasting days? This is neurotica, showered in guilt, covet my signs that tell me all i really think i should feel. I've gotten all the help that I could have found, but all i really know I can't be stopped from falling down. Leave me on the ground. BREAK ME. EXPOSE ME. BLACKMAIL me for ALL THE SHADES I LACK. TELL THEM ALL THAT I'M NOT WORTH IT show whats hiding in the surface. I spent all day in the abyss. SURROGATE for a DEMONS EMBRACE. this is my face worn torn. CARESSED IN the SECRETS OF OLD LOVERS. bad habits and all the clocks I've set back could never account for how much I lost track . I am lost. And I can't be found. Remember to leave me on the ground. Here with no resound. I DON'T NEED YOUR LOVE.
(bring me back to life. To every single dying night that only felt so right. To every drop of fear that never made me feel alive. when i have no choice but to go and watch myself fucking die. Watch me die. fuck i'm alive as if the first time's not enough to show i'm dying inside. neurotic driven by the urge to see beyond my own lies. but for the record all my faults layed out one last time. Bring me back to life. so BREAK ME. EXPOSE ME. BLACKMAIL ME FOR ALL THE YEARS WE WEREN'T. TELL THE WORLD THAT I AINT SHIT. Seal my fate for a lonely death. I only held the hope for tired breath. But I guess I never did it right. neurotica persists .the boy can reminisce.I have destroyed my reputation. reparation. 96 standing still. 96 still standing. not still. Leave me be. Let me breathe. Let me die. I have taken this time to retreat to abandon. To wither away.
- Track Name: private place
and when i see you in the shadows of a dead unmoving sea
i have a ritual, material and ugly tendency
my eyes are burning from a screen, the only thing i love to see
but at the end, i hope that you can help me see the best in me
i have a feeling, i know you can't help me see the best in me
to live in life you need to sacrifice your own insanity
but if i wake to feel you leaving here then i know i'll believe
the times are fading and returning, it's a cycle i must be
aware of something I should hold, the only problem here is me
before I die I know you'll never help me see the best in me
my only enemy, i'll only help me see the worst in me
my only ally, i can only help me see the best in me
- Track Name: pig
Love stained remorse and Lust colored eyes. MY BLOODY TONGUE preys for YOUR PRESENCE drowned in MY INSECURE VICE. (rewinding to nights where it never fucking happened.) adolescent skin. tongues battle eyes melt. playing with your humanity. paying with your skin. let me to hurt you again and again. Let me make you feel worse. foreshadowed foreplay. Addicted to friction. I won't cum to conclusions. I never have. I never will. you pig. fuck me out of this hole. trapdoors in my nearsighted hot flashed delusion. to highlight your confusion. I'm itching and reaching and pleading for something. A vice to pry for. A cycle to die for. wholehearted obsession. I've found my home i have returned to lay waste to hope. Pigs in my mind. It all must change. Give me your decency to rearrange. The hell continues well after the skin has aged. Lay my bones where life won't sing so I can be good for something.
- Track Name: climax
(this is my open eyed kiss with rejection. Swallow me whole. foreplay the enemy. that is my role.) I WANT TO BE PERFECT, I WANT TO BE WHOLE, I WANT TO BE BEAUTIFUL, I DON'T WANT TO GET OLD. I want to be loved, timid and bold I WANT YOU TO KNOW I WANT YOU TO KNOW I WANT YOU TO KNOW. I DON'T KNOW WHAT I'M DOING. I DON'T KNOW WHERE TO START. this is my dying art. breaking my promises over your head. i'm over your head. i'm better off dead. but you shouldn't trust i word i said. passing time in a passing phase, this is a way for awareness to raise.all i've run out, i've got no strife, please bring me back to life. fuck my demons to sleep its their undying wish. this is my palace of sex. numb. locking lips out of wedlock without a key. i'm the devil mutherfucker. praise the gods of insatiable urges i urge you to push me away. i will use you like clay. CLIMAX, for every false sense of wrong. your skin is my cure. my vice is my god.
- Track Name: satin